When parents divorce or separate, one of the most emotionally charged questions that arises is:
"Can my child choose which parent to live with?"
While a child’s wishes are certainly considered in Texas custody cases, the final decision rests with the court—and it’s based on what is in the best interest of the child.
At Haugen Law Firm, P.C. we help families throughout Denton County, Collin County, Cooke County, Dallas County, and Tarrant County understand how the Texas legal system handles child custody decisions, including how a child’s preference is evaluated.
What Texas Law Says About a Child’s Preference
Texas Family Code allows a child who is 12 years or older to express a preference about which parent they want to live with. However, this is not a deciding factor—it is one of many elements the court may consider.
Important: The child’s preference is not binding. Judges have full discretion to overrule it if they believe another arrangement is in the child’s best interest.
How Does a Child Share Their Preference?
If requested by a party in the case (typically through a motion), the judge may interview the child in chambers (in private) to hear their preferences about:
- Primary residence
- Possession and access (visitation schedule)
This interview is not a formal testimony, and it is conducted without the parents present to help the child feel more comfortable and avoid pressure.
Factors Courts Consider Along With the Child’s Wishes
Even when a child expresses a clear preference, the court evaluates a range of other factors, including:
- Each parent’s ability to care for the child
- The child’s emotional and physical needs
- The home environment of both parents
- Stability and consistency in the child’s life
- Any history of abuse, neglect, or family violence
- The child's relationship with each parent
- School performance, community ties, and siblings
What About Children Under 12?
Children younger than 12 may still have their opinions considered, but they do not have the right to request an interview with the judge. The court may still decide to speak with a younger child if it believes doing so is appropriate.
Can a Child’s Choice Lead to a Custody Modification?
If a child age 12 or older expresses a desire to live with the other parent, it may serve as a basis for modifying an existing custody order, but only if:
- The preference is made through a proper legal motion, and
- There has been a material and substantial change in circumstances
Even then, the court must find that the proposed change is in the child’s best interest.
Caution: Don't Pressure or Coach Your Child
Judges are very experienced in detecting parental coaching or undue influence. If a court believes a child’s preference is based on manipulation or bribery, it could hurt your case.
Always prioritize your child’s emotional well-being, and let them express their thoughts in a safe, neutral environment.
Need Help With Child Custody in Texas?
At Haugen Law Firm, P.C. we understand the sensitive nature of custody decisions—especially when they involve your child’s preferences. Whether you're going through a divorce or seeking a modification of an existing order, our experienced team is here to protect your rights and your child’s best interests.
We’re proud to serve families and individuals across Denton, Collin, Cooke, Dallas, and Tarrant Counties with trusted legal guidance in family law, criminal defense, and estate planning. If you have questions about your legal rights or need personalized support, our dedicated team is here to help. Contact us today!